emptiness claims our hearts, and sadness seeps into our souls. And what does our mind cling to? Our own emptiness, sadness and alone-ness. Our spirit withers and thirsts after an unquenchable need for companionship, touch, and laughter.
Ever feel lonely? No matter how
many people who surround you on a Sunday morning? You feel left out of
something--something intangible. You aren't unhappy with your life; you just feel
lonely and alone. If you try to describe what you are going through, no
one understands. When my husband resigned his church in Kentucky and
we moved to Oklahoma, I felt this loneliness. Even though I was
thrilled to be with my family, there was something missing. I missed
the fellowship of friends. I missed the familiarity of routine, of
places I frequented.
I've also had times of extreme loneliness when I am attacked by
someone for reasons I cannot understand. I search my mind for words and
conversations I've had. I retrace my steps and consider everything
I've done. When I come up with no answers, I feel very alone. I want
to reconcile and restore a relationship but do not know where to start.
A slight, an outright betrayal. There are times in life we all find
ourselves suffering, filled with sorrow for a situation we cannot
change. God understands this. Jesus understands it.
"He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familar
with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces, he was
despised, and we esteemed him not." Isaiah 53:3
Can you imagine having been fully in the presence of God Himself,
without a single person to interrupt your time with Him? Can you
comprehend sitting at your father's feet, sharing joy and dancing in
perfect union, with total harmony? It's hard to grasp, but I can
imagine how great it would be. It's what I long for. It's during my
lonely times I am reminded of how much Jesus gave up to come to earth to
provide me an eternal presence with Him. I am reminded how very lonely
He was among men. Who could He possibly turn to for understanding?
Who on earth could be the friend He needed to share the future that lay
ahead? Who could befriend Him, could listen and empathize? Who could
hear Him, and shoulder His burdens? Who could relate to the joys of His
past--the freedom from flesh, the comfort of perfection? Who could
possibly relate to the relationship He had with His Father in heaven?
Who could endure the ridicule and harassment he endured, and live with
it, without a friend on earth to turn to for encouragement? Who could
He trust with His heart? I dare say, no one.
I believe loneliness is part of the reason Jesus spent so much time
with the Father in prayer. He needed His strength, His empowerment, His
companionship. He sought it early...every morning. Why? Because there is no other companionship on
earth which could ever equal that of the Creator's. None. No other
relationship gives us enough of what we need to fill the void within us.
Loneliness has no standards or fundamental rules. When one is
lonely, he longs for companionship. Sometimes I think I need a person
to talk to, to email, to call, to have lunch with. Other times I need
more. Whenever I feel this great loneliness seep into my heart, I am
certain of one thing--I need Jesus. Only He can fill my empty spaces.
Sometimes He brings me a friend to talk to. Sometimes He gives me extra
attention from my husband or a family member. But I know it is Jesus
who fills this void completely.
© Hariette Petersen, SelahV Today, 2010
