It's been over 7 months since a car barrelled through a stop sign and slammed into my Chevy Malibu and caused my air bag to deploy and smack me in the neck and shoulder. I wish I could say I am topnotch and all better. I really do. But I can't.
It is an aggravating thing to look back on the little things I took for granted, crafting and puzzles with my grandchildren...painting lessons...and normal everyday activities--and know I must be very careful and measure every movement or end up in excruciating pain again. Really aggravating.
I had the Allstate folks contact me last week to settle the accident. They offered me a settlement which barely covers the bills, gas, and interest for the money I laid out to pay the hospital bills and have not been reimbursed yet. It's funny. They tell me that my time, my health, my well-being, my pain is not worth anymore than they are offering. "Offering". That's a silly word. They offer, I reject or accept. But the offer is theirs alone. It is based on other folks in my area with a similar injury, etc. Stats. I wonder how many other people did what I did, and feel like I do since their accident. I wonder how many people are going along in life, doing some ministry they feel will bring joy to another and have their life change in a nano-second at a stop-sign. I noticed just this week that whenever I look up at the megatrons in worship that I get headaches. A simple thing. But, to me, an important thing.
Perhaps not to others. I just know what I could do, what I can't and don't do today because of how I feel. I sometimes wonder if I ever will be again. But that probably isn't covered in the insurance world's list of compensations, is it?
I'm grateful I don't work outside the home. I am grateful I am not like others who must do the things I no longer do. I suppose that should be enough, huh? Especially in light of a dear husband who takes up the slack for my uselessness because I am still not myself. It's annoying though. It really is. I just hold onto "The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me." selahV for Today
