It was the most vivid dream--of any kind--I've had in multiple years. We had a big get-together to celebrate something. And you were there, but a car came rushing into the crowd and the party broke up. When the crowds dispersed, you were not there. I looked and looked for you for a long long time and couldn't find you. I grieved and grieved because I didn't know where you were. I was afraid you'd been killed. Then at another gathering of hundreds of people, I began to cry. I was really unconsoleable. Your dad seemed to be keeping something from me. I drove all night long trying to find you because I thought you were still alive. When I returned to the gathering, it was winding down and I went in our house because we were trying to sell it. (None of this makes much sense this morning, you know.) But then it happened.
You showed up in a fancy sports car. I started to wail. You were ALIVE. I'd been mistaken all these years. As you approached me, you were extremely happy to see me till you noticed I was crying uncontrollably. Then you backed away. I shook my head and begged you not to go. I was so overwhelmed with joy. That's when you came and hugged me and held me and I was so happy you were here with me. I was celebrating with everyone and then you left. I didn't understand why you left without saying good-bye. I asked if you'd left us your number but you hadn't. I had no idea how to get in touch with you. You just left without saying goodbye or you loved me. Kinda like I did with you the night before you died. It breaks my heart I never said, "I love you, too." Oh, for a few chances to do things over, huh? Love you, Mom
